Why do people go to therapy? This is a question that I hear rather frequently, albeit in various forms. People go to therapy for many different reasons. The numerous of reasons are beyond the scope of this post. However, I will briefly discuss two common reasons that I haven’t covered in previous posts: stress and anxiety, and depression.
Some people may decide to see a therapist because they are experiencing anxiety, depression, or have experienced a loss, such as a death or divorce, or a trauma. Others may be trying to overcome an eating disorder, or an addiction. People may be experiencing phase of life concerns, have relationship difficulties, existential questions, feel unhappy in their career, or feel generally unsatisfied with one or more elements of their lives. Thus, there are many reasons different people may see a therapist at different points in their lives.
If someone has been to therapy before and had a positive experience, they are more likely to be familiar with therapy, and the benefits of it. For others, it is more foreign and they may have a lot of questions. I’ve been asked by clients “What kind of people go to therapy?” Or “Do you ever see other people like me.” When someone asks these questions, she/he may be asking if I am experienced or qualified to treat a particular issue. However, I think that these questions are more meaningful than that. I think what the person is often asking is “Am I the only one who feels this way?” Moreover, the person wants to know “Why do I feel like this, and will I always feel this bad?”
These are completely understandable questions. When someone is suffering from any type of internal duress, it can feel lonely, overwhelming and sometimes hopeless. Although every human being is unique, there are often common threads in the element of suffering. Yes, I have seen clients paralyzed by anxiety, stranded in the desert of depression, grieving a loss, or suffering from the aftermath of a trauma. I have also seen people rebound from these issues, heal, and overcome the obstacles they face. I have seen suffering, but I also have seen strength, hope, and resilience.
If I were to generalize, some of the most common concerns I currently treat are stress and various types of anxiety, depression, trauma, disordered eating, and self-harming behaviors. Human beings are incredibly complex and individuals vary in how these issues affect them, the severity and frequency of their symptoms, and the underlying causes of the symptoms. This is also why therapy sessions, goals, and the duration of therapy vary from person to person.
Also, not everyone fits into these categories, and it is not uncommon for someone to be experiencing one or more difficulty at a time. Depression and anxiety may co-exist; chronic stress or anxiety can lead to depression. Unresolved grief and loss issues may cause someone to feel depressed. People who are very high functioning may be experiencing debilitating anxiety or depression, but they may be suffering silently. Others may be visibly unable to function due to anxiety or depression.
What we commonly refer to is anxiety is quite broad and includes many different forms of anxiety. According to the DSM-5, “Anxiety Disorders include disorders that share features of excessive fear and anxiety . . . .” You can also experiences chronic stress and anxiety without having an anxiety disorder. Anxiety Disorders include Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attacks, Panic Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder, Separation Anxiety Disorder (common in children), OCD, Phobias, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), other anxiety disorders not listed here, and other manifestations of anxiety that don’t meet the criteria for one of the issues listed.
I have written previous blog entries on traumatic stress/PTSD and Panic Attacks. I am not going to cover all the different types of anxiety in this bog post. However, many people experience stress at different points in their lives. According to the DSM-5, in the United States, the 12 month prevalence of generalized anxiety disorder among teens and adults in 2.9%. The lifetime risk is 9.0%. It is twice as common in females. The statistics are different for the other forms of anxiety listed above.
Clinically speaking, there are different types of depression. I am not going to discuss the different types of depression here because it’s not really important for the purpose of this post. Like anxiety, depression is not uncommon in the United States. According to the DSM-5, the 12 month prevalence of major depressive disorder (one type of depression) is 7%. It is more frequent in late adolescence and early adulthood.
What is important for the purpose of this blog post, and moreover, important for most people who seek therapy for sadness and/or depression, is their subjective experience of being depressed: how it feels to be depressed and how it affects your life. Obviously depression can include feeling sad, tearful, and lonely, but it can also include feelings of anger, irritability, moodiness, and hopelessness.
In adolescents, irritability may be one of the primary symptoms. Other teenagers may be tearful, appear sad, avoid certain situations, or withdraw from friends or activities that they previously enjoyed. Depression can affect sleep, appetite, concentration, and energy levels. It can often lead to social withdrawal, decreased social interactions, changes in friendships, changes within the family, and can school or work performance.
Since depression can lead to isolation, social withdrawal, and feelings of hopelessness and/or suicidal thoughts, it is helpful to obtain professional help from a mental health professional, such as a counselor or psychotherapist and/or physician. I have written a previous post on suicide risk factors and counseling.
When a person is depressed or experiencing anxiety, they often feel very alone even if they are surrounded by people. It is important to know that there is help for depression, there is hope, and you can feel better. Counseling can be an effective treatment method for depression. If you think you, or your teen is depressed, please do not hesitate to call a counselor or therapist. You are not alone, you can heal, and life can get better.
If you are concerned about your child, or a friend, you may be worried about asking them about changes in their behavior and mood. Many times people are relieved to have someone ask them questions like: “How are you feeling?” Or, “you seem down; do you want to get some coffee/lunch and talk?” Additionally, directly asking the person “have you thought about talking to someone?” can be helpful because it tells the person you care about them, and it normalizes the idea of going to a counselor for help and guidance.
If you are interested in therapy for yourself, or your child, you are welcome to contact me for a free telephone consultation. I am happy to answer any questions you may have about me, therapy, and how I may be able to help you. I offer afternoon, evening, and Saturday appointments in my Palo Alto office.
Thank you for posting this. It’s informative and I found it helpful to read.